Poker Déjà vu

When I was young-er I would wake up and record my weird dreams. Some days I remember my dreams vividly, other days I struggle to even recall the plots. Often I would be chased by some bad guys and I would have a weapon on me, they would always fail. The bullets fall to the ground, the stick become limp, or I get shot first. But as I grew up, and gained confidence, I can actually overcome and kill the bad guys. As I continue to age, I only remember the weird scenarios, scenarios that are familiar but out of place at the same time. And so when I see it play out in real life, the Déjà vu feeling is very strong to me. I have minimum three scenarios that really blew my mind.

I started playing poker in 1999, but that was just for fun. At the time I probably got to play live poker maybe a few days a year so playing live was a treat. In 2005 I was in Sydney for a work trip so I took the opportunity to play poker after hours. During that time they only had 2 tables, one NLH and I was playing on the limit table. In one particular hand I remembered dreaming about the situation. And I remembered a Japanese player would turn his head and say something to me. At the time I remembered what he was going to say before hearing him say it about a second later. Playing poker was something familiar with me, but in Sydney with a Japanese guy talking to me was not. I even mouthed the words he was about to utter before he did. 

April last year I was playing tournament poker in Taipei. One night I had a dream that I won a tournament and the key hand was 77 vs AK. When I woke up I even told my partner about it. I was in the midst of a bad run and was down 200k NTD (7k USD) for the trip at the time. It was the last tournament of the series, and the toughest being the high roller's event as well, and I lost my first bullet. But I rebought and made my way into the final table. 5 players left and I was the chip leader. Second chip leader was close behind but the others were short comparatively. I looked down at 77 and opened. Second chip leader decides to put me all in. If I lost that hand, I would be the shortest stack. But I felt a wave of confidence and remembered my dream. Snap call, he flips over AK. Flop 7. I went on to win it and turned my losing trip into a winning one. 

Nice prize money to go with my trophy

In 2019 I played full time cash games at a private game and also at the casino. The casino had the ugliest chips I've ever played with. One night I had a dream I was playing with the casino crowd, but somehow the poker room was different, and the green chips were different. Familiar and out of place at the same time. A few weeks later the casino hosted the WPT tour. The cash game tables were moved to the ballroom, and they introduced a new design for the green $25 chip. It then came to me I dreamt about this before. 

Old chips old tables

The chips in my dreams

I don't know what is Déjà vu, whether it is a glimpse into the future, or I am just reliving history, or someone altered the code in Matrix and it's a glitch. But often good things follow when I have a Déjà vu moment, or it gives me a sense of assurance that I am on the right path. Whatever it is, it proves that dreams do come true!

If you have any Déjà vu experiences please do share with me!

What happened in September 2020

In September I played a total 174 hours of poker, this time I had some Holdem under my belt. After playing PLO every day I do miss Holdem even though it is slower and more grindy. Unfortunately my results in Holdem was lacking but I still made a small profit for September. 

250bb and still a short stack

Can you believe I've played 1500+ hours of live poker in 2020? I guess I shouldn't complain that I have this opportunity but maybe I am close to burning out. Playing as a player is one thing but playing whilst hosting is another. I have been involved in 5 poker clubs but none as tiring and complicated as this one. I can feel the stress get to me everyday and it's affecting my sleep and health. But I didn't know that I was a workaholic until now. Even when I am "not working" I am. 

I have put on a lot of weight in recent months, because food has become my reward after a hard day's work. Plus I lack the energy and time to work out. Someone very close to me passed away in September and I find myself questioning my own mortality. I am not afraid of dying but I do not want my loved ones to suffer if I leave. Health has to be a top priority in the coming months and I am trying to work on my diet and maybe work in a small daily workout. 

One of my self rewards

Recently I have also been thrown into a tough financial situation. I find myself out a lot of money and unless things start to turn around for me, all may have been for nothing. But that shouldn't affect the giving mentality and helping others who need it more than I do. But it is becoming a bigger internal struggle as every dollar hurts, and my logic is fighting with my heart everyday. 

Sorry my posts have become more depressing and philosophical. I actually have so much to share but I can't at the present time. When I was in Vietnam I often thought to myself how I would write about the truth of my experience in Vietnam. But after I left, I have put that behind me and moved on. I say the same thing about Cambodia but maybe I'll look back and feel the same way.